Sanity restored

I finally reached my breaking point with the way things were going (or not going?) around here.  The whining and complaining from the kids (i.e. older kid) was incessant, and there was nothing but nagging and yelling coming out of my mouth.  I spent the better part of one day coming up with my plan and so far it has been working very well.  I am sooo happy.  We are all so much happier.

I wrote up a one page chart of "schedule and responsibilities."  The times and tasks are listed down the side and days of the week across the top.  It includes, in detail, everything Karly needs to do from the time she gets up, to the time she goes to bed, and what time she needs to do it, such as:
7:15 - 7:20 - make bed
7:20 - 7:30 - get dressed, including socks
7:30 - 7:35 - fold pj's and place on bed, or put in hamper if dirty

I put the paper in a plastic sheet protector and attached it to a clipboard.  She keeps it with her and as she completes each item she marks it off with a dry-erase marker.  At the end of the day, if she has completed every task on time she earns 1 bean.  When she collects 15 beans she can pick a reward from a list of options such as, "go out for ice cream", "invite a friend over for a playdate", etc. 

I also incorporated a behavior component, based on the model they use at her school.  I came up with 4 simple rules, such as use kind words, have a good attitude, etc.  How well she is following the rules is quantified by a color system:
orange = excellent behavior
green = good behavior, as expected
yellow = warning
red = serious trouble!
Just like at school, she has a clip that starts out on green and depending on her behavior throughout the day, the clip can move up or down the color scale.  At the end of the day, she earns or loses additional beans based on what color she is on.

Her initial response to the whole thing was less than enthusiastic, "I was perfectly happy before!  Why are you ruining my life with this chart?!"  However, I think it is really working for her and she couldn't help being enticed by the bean reward system.  The morning routine has been the most successful part and the most dramatic improvement.  Previously, there was a constant stream of  "come on, let's go, hurry, put your clothes on, come on, brush your teeth, let's go" coming out of my mouth.  And there was a constant stream of whining and crying "I can't, I am!, my leg hurts I can't walk, I'm sooo tired," coming out of her mouth as she moved slower than a turtle in molasses.  Now, she is completely getting herself ready on time (even early) and without complaining, and I don't have to say a word!  The afternoon homework is still a bit painful, but I think we're getting there. 

The one other change I made was moving bedtime (to 8 pm) and wake up time earlier (to 7 am).  It has been interesting to me to realize how much time she really needs to accomplish things.  When I wrote the schedule I felt like I was allowing huge chunks of time for things that would be done much quicker.  Interestingly, the reality is that we really do need to allow that much time!  One minute to put on pjs?  No, it really does take 5 minutes.